Why Words cannot be a Subjective Matter

In many of my previous articles, the subject of the definition of words and their importance appeared as a secondary underlying issue. It is always in the background of many conversations. Especially the ones associated with progressive ideas. The topic is somehow always there but never discussed directly. Making all other arguments more complex than what they should be. Circling around this matter prevents the conversation from arriving to its a priori problem – What is the role of words in human interaction and society. As many of the issues of our current society have to do with emotions and acceptance, we have been taught that we need to be very careful with the words we use, in order not to offend anyone by mistake. Furthermore, a general weaponization preventing us from having this important conversation is the notion adopted by many that words are violence. A topic I dived into in my last article. I believe that if we are to solve our social malaise, addressing the importance of words and their role in our interaction is crucial.

To fully understand the topic, we cannot avoid defining what word is. While it may sound absurd to some, I find that in many conversations with people, I eventually reach a point where people decide to explain me that I do not have the authority to dictate definitions. Fortunately, they are completely right. Since if I had this authority, they would have it too, making all the conversation a chaotic emotional matter, bringing us nowhere. As I will show later on, it is exactly this point that needs to be tackled if we are to achieve peace, trust, and positive collaboration. The question regarding definition, why we need one we all agree on, and who has the authority to establish it, are the core ideas we will cover here.

The definition of the word “WORD” in the Cambridge dictionary is – “a single unit of language that has meaning and can be spoken or written “. This definition is extremely important as it will allow us to build upon it in all our conversations. By its definition, what makes a word a word is the fact that it has a meaning attached to it. Without a meaning, it is just sound. Let us take it one step further.  Babies make a lot of sounds which are not words.  Moreover, parents learn over time the meaning of certain sounds or combinations of them. By doing so, a new vocabulary is created between the parents and the kid, making these sounds become words, as they have a meaning recognized by all sides. In her early stages my daughter started to call shoes “Titi”. It was one of her first “words”. We all understood what she meant by this “word”. From her side, she was getting her shoes when expressing the word Titi. Reinforcing in her the notion that the correct word for shoes is indeed Titi. From this example, we can extend our definition and say that words are “a single unit of language that has meaning and can be spoken or written, recognized and agreed between at least 2 people “.

This brings us one step closer to our current inquiry, back to the story of my daughter. While she was extremely adorable, after a short period we, as her parents, decided that we should explain to her that Titi is not the right word to describe shoes. Back then, it was a natural conclusion that we, as parents, reached simultaneously. But why? Why was it important for us to explain and teach her the “correct word” to describe shoes? The answer has to do with the word “correct” in the previous question. The notion of the “correct word” vs the “incorrect word” brings us a full circle to the most fundamental question presented at the beginning of this article: What are words? And why their meaning is so important?

Words are a tool of communication that allows us humans to collaborate better, build trust, and create culture. It is by using words that we tell each other stories, express ideas, create agreed-upon frameworks, and tell each other what we need. It is efficient. Furthermore, language helps us overcome violence and chaos. Our capacity to communicate with each other reduces the chance we will all burst into a rage as we have the tools to explain ourselves, listen to others' explanations of their inner world, and negotiate compromises. On many levels, it is language and the correct usage of words that make us humans the controllers of earth, as it gives us a tool to develop abstract thinking, social strategies and the tools needed not kill each other over random frustrations.

There is one important aspect of the usage of words that makes them such a powerful tool. It has to do with the extension of the definition above. For words to work on a scale that allows positive collaboration or for that matter any cooperation, it requires that all the people involved agree and understand the meaning of the words one is using. It is the building block of the successful usage of words and language. If we are to use words in a positive manner or at all, we must agree upfront on what specific words mean. This brings us directly to the concept of “correct words” mentioned before. We will address politically correct later on. For now, let us define “Correct” as the Oxford dictionary defines it:

1.       True or accurate: agreeing with facts: right.

2.      Having no errors or mistakes.

3.      Proper or appropriate in a particular situation.

Based on this definition, in a utilitarian simplistic manner, the “correct word” means – “a single unit of language used without errors or mistakes in the right context, with agreed upon meaning by at least 2 people and can be spoken or written promoting mutual communication.” Eventually, it all comes down to the successful act of communication. The level of easy and effective communication is directly correlated to the term “correct”, as less brain juice is required from one person to understand another person’s sentence if he knows exactly the words and their meaning prior to hearing the sentence.

The easiest way to understand the paragraph above is to understand that the reason we decided to correct my child with regard to the shoe word, is because we aim for her to communicate not only with us but with the rest of society at large. It is her capacity to use accurate words, expressed in the right context, and pronounced without mistakes that will allow her to communicate with people around her. It is what makes words so useful and effective. As I happened to learn, it may take years for children to learn it correctly. A painful process that requires a lot of effort and patience from parents.

Culture is based on common stories that create shared concepts and meaning. An integral part of the creation of these stories is the words that are used to compose them. As we saw above, one of the fundamental aspects of words is that they are understood by everyone in society. By having this structure intact, ease of collaboration and trust can be built. I will argue at this point that what makes words efficient is that they have a simple definition attached to them. The simplicity and clarity of the definition are crucial as they allow people to express themselves accurately with the confidence that the other side understands exactly what they are trying to express. Communication is not an easy business as it reflects the complexity of both reality around us and our inner world. After all, the purpose of words is communication, and the purpose of the communication is to pass a certain message. It is beneficial if the person who is trying to convey the message has a certain level of certainty that the other side understands most (if not all) of it in the first pass. Language and words are a facilitator at its roots, not a reason for complication.

The danger of having multiple meanings to certain words is that it hinders our capacity to understand each other correctly. By allowing multiple definitions/meanings to a single word, the chance of gaps in understanding grows. With it, our incapability to understand each other increases, promoting frustration and lack of trust. The case for variation of definition for a single word can work as long as the different definitions are connected (as shown in the example of the definition of the word “correct” above). On the other hand, when words have no clear definition or a contradicting one, our capacity to communicate and understand each other falls apart, promoting not only alienation between people but increasing the possibility of violence in society. After all, it is our capacity to believe we understand each other and the successful empiric experience reassuring us of that fact that helps us feel connected, understood, and part of something bigger than us.

In most of the advanced languages, a vast vocabulary exists, built over time to express the philosophical, cultural, and psychological depth of its people. The reason for it is simple:  The more words exist in a vocabulary; the more flexibility people have to express themselves accurately. There is a reason that in most cultures, part of each person's education is to learn its vast vocabulary. As humans, we are attracted to people who have the capacity to use words correctly and find it complicated to connect to people who do not understand us. It is the accuracy of the words we use that helps us build collaborative relationships and the belief other people understand our meaning when we speak that builds trust.

The topic of the definition of words has been part of the Western discourse in recent years. It seems the progressive part of our society decided that the best way to blow up our society and eradicate our culture is to start playing with the meaning of words. Creating chaos in society, promoting confusion, and playing with the foundation of what we all knew until yesterday was not only simple but constructive. This movement led by extreme subjectivism (see article)  and a general notion of deconstructionism, brought forward by the “protestant” notion that each person can define words as he pleases. Opening the door to a flood of confusion and chaos.

While this entitled part of our society truly believes they have the right to define words endlessly, their actions mainly promote communication problems and the general loss of meaning. I believe that their push toward this direction reflects mainly the inner chaos that they are trying to push on all of society.  The idea that no one has the authority to define words comes from their incapability to accept society and its culture at large – representing the fight against the limitation society requires from them. It is a reflection of their demand from society to bend to their will regardless of their lack of direction. This dangerous game is a losing one. As we bend our foundation for the purpose of not offending mentally unstable people at best or supporting nihilism at worst.

It is important to understand that what this movement is claiming is not that new words should be invented as new phenomena emerge, but that words should and can be redefined randomly based on personal wimp. We will all agree that any sports team will not work if each player has the capacity to change the rules of the game on the fly based on his needs and feelings. It is an absurd notion that is intuitive. On the other hand, when it comes to the rules of our society, it seems we are willing to accept this absurdity. As I wrote above, there is some hypocrisy involved, as many people who claim other people do not have the subjective authority to dictate definition take on themselves to do exactly the same thing. In other cases, they leave the argument explaining that no definition is possible to start with. A notion that is even more absurd, as they are expressing this notion by using words to start with.

Verbal communication is a facilitator of human interaction. It is a tool that was developed for the benefit of people. It is done by using words that follow very simple rules (as mentioned in our extended definition above) – “a single unit of language used without errors or mistake in the right context, that has accepted meaning by at least 2 people and can be spoken or written promoting mutual communication.” It is the accuracy and simplicity of this mechanism that makes it so fundamental to the human experience. Culture and society at large have been built on this simple foundation, allowing us to evolve and prosper.

As we enter what seems an advanced stage of social collapse, it is important we understand what our tools are to fight it. Order is necessary as it allows us to prosper and build. It gives us the peace of mind we need to find the commonalities we all share and separate the important from the unimportant parts. I have no doubt in my mind that the structure of order can and should change, as time and people evolve and differ from each other. In any case, the need for order is always there. It is the spoiled part of our society that never lived close enough to chaos and forgot its terrible outcome. It is an entitled part of society that does not understand what are the consequences of demolishing everything that gave them the peace and tranquillity they leaned upon in their pursuit of chaos in the first place.

Words are the building block of human prosperity. Our passive capacity to learn definition and use them on a mass scale is what built our culture, heritage, and prosperity. Without a solid and simple frame of communication, violence and chaos will emerge. This pushes us far away from what I believe is the wish of most humans – live in a peaceful and prosperous society that gives them meaning and the capacity to raise and protect their loved ones.  Words are not a game of subjective definitions. Unless you are a person who takes on himself to make the life of everyone around you complicated, a table is a neutral word that describes a piece of furniture with a flat top and one or more legs, providing a level surface for eating, writing, or working at. As long as we all know how to mentally identify a table and call it that way, nobody should really care about the word itself. Furthermore, this passive agreement saves us a lot of mental juice, as most of us have much better things to do in life: fighting a complicated reality, doing the best we can in the complexity of our own existence and hoping for a better future.

Reflection on the Outcome of Believing Words are Violence

Censorship, silencing of narratives, and the demand of spoiled generations to cancel people and destroy their careers are part of a growing movement, directly connected to the fall of democracy and the loss of freedom. It started slowly in the COVID period and has accelerated since then exponentially, eroding everything the Western world fought to protect for the last century. The latest steps of the UK government outlawing posting certain content on social media with the threat of jail time is just another step towards the general takeover of Western governments over our freedom of speech and apparently freedom of thought. Like most hostile takeovers of tyrannical regimes, general support is needed by the majority of the population in the early stages of the tyrannical grasp on power. It is only by having the support of a big part of the population that it rises from the first place. In many historical cases, a reality is created in which the population asks for extreme measures. Building legitimacy for the regime to rise and establish itself. While in some cases this social movement comes from external factors such as war or general depression, some other times it is built based on a divergence of the population perspective, regardless of the well-being of the population. In the latter case, it is done slowly and then all at once. For reference see  - Rudi Dutschke's “The long march through the Institution”.

The loss of freedom and demand from our government to censor, cancel, and eliminate all opinions that contradict the beliefs of certain minorities or the general population was slow and then happened all at once. It started with the defense of fragile soles and escalated to protecting any narrative that do not fit the indoctrination message of the controlling party. This movement is the hallmark of a falling apart population. One that historically, brings chaos, death, and poverty. Democracy and freedom of speech are one of the most fundamental goods developed by the West. Protecting its citizens and allowing them to thrive. In the case of the current movement supporting the censorship of voices, the lose of freedom of speech has been supported by a boomer generation that is too afraid to speak or offend anyone. Holding the line in the general belief of compliance to authority. The real poster child of the slow and certain fall of the Western system and its values is led by the young generation that not only supports the cancel culture, safe spaces, and controlled censoring but demands it from their government due to their lost and fragile souls.  (I wrote about it extensively in my latest book – “Meaning in the Age of Absurdity”).

The bottom line of all the supporters of this movement comes to a simple line repeated ad infinitum – the notion that words are violence. This is the line they protect. Giving them the support they need to move forward with peace of mind, believing logic is with them. As many other ideas repeated in that way, a logic exists that supports their insanity. One that some people find hard to handle with. It is not by mistake or by chance. It is part of the general propaganda pushed on everyone for half a decade now. Helping to create the necessary foundation for the general takeover of autocrats in our free and peaceful democracy. As I will show later on, this argument at best shows the fragility of people and supports the lack of capacity of many people to take control or responsibility for their own actions. Projecting their incapacity into humanity as a whole. At worst, it is just a blind repetition of an exhausted mind that lived too long in a state of fear and lost the capacity to fight propaganda. We are walking into autocrat socialism and the majority of the population is not only supporting it but asking for it.

I believe that if we are to save our democracy and protect our freedom, the idea that words are violence needs to be addressed and dissolved. At its core this idea mainly supports the logic needed for our government to increase its grip on our life, dangerously degrading our democracies. While allowing people to hide behind their comfortable wall of misery, justifying the victimhood story that they hold so dear.

The first argument people use to justify this notion goes as follows (and believe me, I’m doing here an intellectual favour to most of the people who hold this notion) – Words are used by humans to express ideas. Many people acquire their ideas from hearing them from someone else. Ideas can bring to action, which sometimes can be violent. Conclusion – words are violence. 

While this argument sounds solid, it has some wrong assumptions at its core. Words are a tool of communication. By itself, words are neutral and are part of the tool we as humans developed. Language is a human phenomenon used uniquely by our species, promoting collaboration, trust, and expression. Words are a tool, while violence is an action. Philosophically and logically words cannot be violent as at their core one is a tool while the other is an action. It is possible to use a tool for a certain action, which does not make a tool the action itself. A car is not dangerous, the driver is. A gun is not dangerous, the person who uses it is. Alcohol is not dangerous, irresponsible drunk people are.  As a first conclusion when approaching this subject, we can conclude that violence is dangerous but not words. Fundamentally, it is the people that should be addressed and not the tools they are given. The written sentence would be in this case – Some words can bring some people to commit violent acts. At this point, an important question arises – Do some words always bring all people to commit violence? the answer is no. Meaning that not all people will immediately commit violent acts upon hearing a set of words. Meaning it is neither the words nor the people in general that can be categorized as violent.

Now let’s move to the concept of violence. Violence is an important concept. It is an inevitable part of human existence and nature. The effect of physical violence is important to frame and withhold. By butchering the word and its concept, we bring society to a very dangerous place. One in which real problems and victims cannot be addressed and treated properly. Opening the door to absurdities and dissonance that do not help society. I hope we can all agree that we cannot compare a case of rape to a case in which an overweight person is called fat. Or the violent act of a bitten wife to a confused young adult when addressed based on his sex of birth and not his momentary pronounce. Or that a war veteran's PTSD cannot be compared to a woman who has been explained she is not physically equal to men due to her genetic composition. Crossing and blurring the line of the concept of violence is a dangerous game that will prevent us from helping real victims while preventing us from identifying violence and its danger when it erupts. Additionally, it promotes the overreach of government and the silencing of diversity of opinions, promoting tyranny and eroding democracy from within.

As I showed above, this argument attacks people and their actions. It collectivizes the usage of the word violence to absurdity and assumes humans have little agency or self-control. It strips people of their autonomy, capacity to evolve, and wish to be part of society. At its core, it reflects a general belief held by many people today claiming that the main issue with humanity is humans. An approach that I find to be devastating. The greatness of humans is based on our capacity to think, create, self-regulate, and peacefully collaborate. The fact we are all here is proof that most of the people are aiming for peace and prosperity. It shows how capable we are of cooperation and proves that we are not the problem but the solution. While some of us can be violent and fewer are psychopathically evil, generalizing humanity based on the sick minority is not only wrong but unproductive. Most of us are responsible adults, with the capacity to think, self-regulate, and aim for peace and prosperity in our own domain.

The second approach supporting the notion that words are violent goes along this lines – Violence creates physical pain. Words can offend a person. Offense can be described as mental pain. Mental experience is as relevant and existing as physical pain. This means words are violent. While this approach is less sophisticated it is a red flag and a symptom of the sickness that engulfs the current Western society.

This logic is a symptom of the progressive mind virus taking over our society. The logical tactic used in this argument is often used by the progressive, as it is extremely effective in shutting down opposition or healthy intellectual conversation. It has all the components that neo-progressives love and cherish. First, it is based on a subjective experience. After all, it is complicated to argue with a person about the level of pain one feels inside. Secondly, it distorts the words we are using in order to create mental chaos. By applying the word pain to every discomfort the word loses its value and with it the real horror of physical pain. Moreover, if met with resistance, the immediate reaction of the progressive will be to admit that pain comes in different levels but immediately counterattack by accusing the other side of lack of sensibility, empathy or in some cases (mainly reflecting low intelligence or just blind repetition) they will start to shout toxic masculinity/ racism/ bigotry or fascism.

The most important aspect of this argument is that it sits beautifully with the main philosophy of the progressive – Victimhood. In the mind of a progressive he is oppressed. Which on many levels is true. We are all oppressed in one way or another. That’s life. Life is hard, demanding, and complicated and nobody is coming to save you. The real question is what you do about it. The oppressed card is always amusing, as it comes with a baggage of emotional distress. Most of the time, the mixture of facing an emotionally distressed person who explains he is in pain, combined with the direct attack claiming the other person is at best unempathetic and in the worst case a fascist, toxic bigot, degrades the level of the intellectual conversation to zero. Making one side highly uncomfortable and the other believing he or she just got the confirmation that they are not only right but also increases the validity that they are a real victim or protectors of one.

The real difference between this argument and the previous one is that unlike the first, the second has to do with the weakness and mentality of the people using this argument. It has nothing to do with human behavior or the fear of a violent Armageddon. This time it has to do with how the people that use this argument see the world and their place in it. It represents the standardization of fragility and the general softening of a spoiled, peaceful entitled Western society. One that has been promised that they deserve everything at the price of nothing. And that what really counts is not the world and the capacity to integrate into it but how they feel and the requirements of the world to bend to that. It represents the failure of our educational system. The loss of meaning and the need to be a victim for the purpose of being something in this world. In my last book “Meaning in the Age of Absurdity”, I address this phenomenon in detail, including its cause, social symptoms, and the potential steps we can take to start to overcome this crisis.

The disturbing aspect of the second argument is that for most people, it is impossible to handle. The logic itself is impact. It is the fundamental truth of the statements which is the problem. The twisting of words and their redefinition is a tool often used by manipulators and sales personnel. It leaves many people defenseless as they do not have neither the time nor the intellectual training to handle with such problems. Additionally, it touches on a very peculiar feeling most humans have – the wish to feel we are good people. A direct attack of this kind will leave people frozen and make them retreat to agreement or acceptance of the argument presented.

After all, if someone calls me fat and it hurts me it can be for two simple reasons. The first is that I share the notion that I’m fat and I’m unhappy about it. Making the other person simply stating a fact that I feel bad about. If it is a fact and I get offended, it is because of my inner world and my uncomfortably with it and not the problem of the other person stating that. On many levels, people need to hear the hard truth and learn to handle with it. It is the basic requirement for development and real friendship and maturity.  While it is not nice to state the obvious to a struggling person, it is a big stretch to call it violence or to blame my mental dissonance on an external existence. Additionally, if I do not believe I’m fat or do not know the person claiming it, I find it hard to understand how I can be offended in the first place. Not taking hard every nonsense that a stranger throws at you is a big part of maturing. As a father to a 6-year-old child, I can attest to the fact that we all start there and hopefully evolve over time. A young adult who gets offended by false statements heard from strangers mainly reflects a weak mind with a lack of confidence. Which again reflects the weakness of the individual and not the violent aspect of words. If we are to emerge from this chaos, it is strength that we need. Creating policies base on the lower denominator of our society promise continual and evolving weakness. A General trend that will not benefit our current generation or any future one.

of opinion is what makes me different than you and what creates curiosity and creativity. Democracy is based on plurality of opinion and the belief that we don’t have to agree on everything but still fight to allow others to express their opinions. (see Voltaire). Without allowing people the freedom to speak their minds, democracy collapses. It makes us weaker and dumber. Words are not violence. They are the most incredible tool we ever invented. Let us not be guided by the weakest denominator of our society or the fear of hearing we are wrong just because it is uncomfortable. We ought to our future generations. Words are the solution to our problems, they allow us to understand each other better, overcome the gaps of cultural diversity, and make us feel we are heard and relevant.  After all, we all knew until yesterday that it is when diplomacy fails (the usage of words) that wars begin (the usage of violence). Let this one sink in.